I was there, standing in a corner, observing myself moving around between people who were separated out, sitting on the bare floor, or cushions, crouched or cross - legged. I didn't know them. What caught my attention was the clear way I was working with each of them for just a few moments. I couldn't hear what was being said. What I did see was that each person spoke to me and as I responded they began to look different as if the words and the gentle touching altered something for them. I was saying very little, my hands touched them very gently. I was intrigued to notice each person was touched somewhere different, a foot, a hand, the head, the heart, the back. These people all got up and left the room after they had spent just a few minutes with me. Yet there was nothing hurried, the room felt warm and calm, a lovely place to spend time - even though the room was absolutely unadorned. I had the sense of being blessed as I stood and watched this, understanding dimly that I was being shown how to do something very differently.
Then there was only me in the room, as if the other working me had returned inside me. I walked towards the southwest door for everyone had gone out that way, and it was locked. So I turned and walked over to the door in the other corner and noticed that there was no lock on this door and I gently pushed and it opened.
I entered another room, slightly smaller than the other one and the varnish on the floor was in better condition. Nothing on the walls or floor, simple lighting and windows similar to next door. A door in the far corner and nearby that door was a large wooden, oblong, hand-made table, with sturdy square legs. The finish was the most beautiful polished surface that was mirror-like. Around this table sat eleven people, two at each end, four at one side and three on the other. In the middle of the three was a man who was dressed, he had a sports jacket in yellow-green tonings and grey trousers. I could see his black hair and his browned neck above his collar. His back was to me. This room had an even more peaceful blessed feeling, as if I had entered a room where light and air were the one thing. I stood just inside the door, knowing that I was to simply be there and watch.
I looked at the other people around the table and could see that they were different in form, yet all the same in some way as the man who was clothed. Yet the others were not naked, I simply knew they didn't need clothes, for their substance was different. They were different tonings of grey, white and cream and contained shades or shimmerings of other colours, particularly soft blue and an ephemeral purple. Their substance was alive, warm, and moving as if they were breathing with their total being. The man was talking and they were listening to him. There was a total sense of harmony and well being. I knew I was being shown something that I needed to understand.
I blinked my eyes for a moment and when I opened them the man was standing by himself, very softly straight and clear. He walked out of the other door and it fell shut behind him with out a sound. When I walked across to follow him there was no lock and no handle and I could not open the door.
This dream was still very vivid when I went to bed the following night. I had returned to it again and again during the day. Basking in the feeling of the rooms and the people and what I was shown, even if I didn't have any more understanding than that. No dream broke to the surface that night and in the morning I got up before dawn to shower before doing some yoga. The shower is often the place where information begins to come to me about all sorts of things - as if in sleep answers form for questions, ideas come to fruition and readiness and the flow of the shower releases me to what I know.
Into being came the words - aspects of spirit. As I heard, I realised more fully the mystical nature of my dream. I felt again the ambience in those two rooms and knew my spirit was being opened to something more. A deep quiet, a gentle holding of every thing and yet no thing. I cannot adequately put this into words. Whatever I write is once removed from the experience as language is always limited in that words symbolically represents the event and are not the event. Nevertheless, accepting the limits I write.
I saw clearly that round the table had sat the aspects of this man's spirit/energy. While my eyes had shut, they came back into him and I knew that he was whole. Each of those forms was in tune with each other, no dissonance, no splits, no awkward parts. I was shown the nature of spirit - the parts and the whole.
Then my energy moved from being heart-centred to my mind. The change became clear as I wrote - a 'talking about' reflective expression and a need to 'make sense,' to understand. In my body the energy moved down into my solar plexus and I was more driven. I wondered how to work this dream, how to interpret, what's the symbolical significance of the parts? How I would love to be able to fit all of this into Gestalt theory. What a thrill if I could see all the connections and connotations of this experience. I puzzled over what I'd seen and put explanations around it. Should I work all the aspects in pieces of therapy? I began to think about 'out-of-body' experiences and how that experience may be different for each person. I began to consider the connection between sub-personalities and the various roles we develop and polish up in different situations. Was this dream to show me that sub-personalities have spiritual aspects? Was each of these forms a sub-personality and did I need to understand more and work in this way? How is spirit included in working with all or any of the various parts of Gestalt theory: top dog - under dog, resistances, contact, the boundaries, field theory and all the rest?
I also began to be curious about what happens if one of these aspects of spirit went to a denser, darker energy. If one of the energy forms had been different, what would this mean in terms of mental illness and pathological behaviour and spiritual development? I was also curious if we worked and healed ourselves while having this denser energy available would our body, mind and emotions come into a fuller place or be as out of balance as the darker energy was? What does this dream tell me about the nature of my being and of others' being. I wondered if I was being shown through this dream the nature of spirit that is part of each person and how balance is arrived at in a spiritual dimension. Not just about the emotional, mental, physical balance of each being - also about the spiritual balance of each person?
When I stopped reasoning and fussing around how this fits with that and those go with these I returned to the unconditional heart energy and found I had a simple clarity. I knew that the new way in which I was working in the first part of the dream was utterly appropriate, I do not know anything more yet of when, where or how this will manifest. I know healing is about relationship. My relationship to me and how willing I am to be healed. I know healing is assisted if someone else is in relationship with me and assists and encourages me to access my own ability to heal. When I am alive to my ability to self-heal me I may meet the longing of another person who is looking for healing. If contact occurs and I share with them in some way or another, then they may access what they need to heal. Being with may need words or simply silence, touch or simply presence.
In the second room I was shown the breadth and depth of the spiritual nature of being. This is central to the healing of the self in all the aspects. The quality of the energy in the room was similar to the experience of energy in a deep meditation which holds everything and nothing in the same moment. When the man stood up he reflected the sense I had of air and light being one and I noticed how he breathed fully. I recognised I was in the presence of a person who was more evolved than I have ever seen before. The completeness of the energy of this man was as near to the energy of what I believe is Christ consciousness. This whole dream was heart centred. I remember the words of the old hymn writer 'Spirit to spirit Thou dost speak.' My eyes saw and my spirit heard and theory and interpretation may simply rest.
The dream shows me how I need to be aware of my energy and where, as in what part of me, I live and work from. The sum of the parts created for me a greater sense of the essence of spirit that I am invited to learn of and hold as a human being and live from there. I begin to realise how I need to use all I have learned and understand of my own essence - to be and hold energy/consciousness - and know the connection to Godessence each day. My deepening evolution that is possible in this lifetime.
The feeling of the dream remains with me still and as I am able I will work from that place in me that is/knows both air and light. As I breathe more deeply and evolve then I will understand the practice of Gestalt differently and be able to expand the theory to honour the spiritual nature of being. I acknowledge I have wanted to make sense of the dream, and I am the dream.
If my words in some way reach you, so that your spirit is touched or quickened, you are part of the dream, part of the world, part of me and I of you and we are all blessed.
